A Guideline for Marriage
May God’s blessings and mercy be on your Marrriage is the Prophet’s (pbuh) tradition in life; it is not a mere bond and unity between two physical bodies. Rather it is the assemblage of two spirits. Marriage is not aimed at attaining a transient joy, rather at reaching human perfection and perpetuating the human generation.
Be a meritorious wife for your husband as God wants you to be a woman with a prosperous life in this world and a guaranteed salvation in the other world. The following steps may help you to recognize your duties as a wife and to better fulfill them.
One: Accompany your husband to reach his sacred goal and be a partner in safeguarding the marital life.
For the true love is not to look at each Other in the eyes, rather to look towards the same direction. Know that accompanying your husband in same affairs would add to the attraction of marital life.
Two: Try to habituate yourself to religious performances inside the house such as recitation of the Holy Quran in the morning, reading books, following the news, etc. It would have more effect on you if you do it together with your husband.
Three: Do not separate yourself from the people and do not let the marriage prevent you from participating in social affairs. For your duty to defend the truth and help the deprived is not only limited to singleness.
Beware that marriage is not a golden cage to surround you with, rather the husband and wife are as two wings of a bird, the existence of both of which are essential for flying.
It is with the cooperation of each other that you will have a prosperous life.
Four: Your house should be as simple as the prophet’s house; its only decoration would be love, affection, and unity not the luxury, for nothing is more beautiful than love and affection and greater than simplicity.
Five: If your husband attempts to misguide you to¬wards the fire of the hell, be stronger and guide him to the heaven. Do not accompany him if he is committing a sin, for your deeds will be the only intercessor on the Resurrection Day not your husband.
Be a follower of Hazrat Fatima Zahra (sa). When Imam Ali (as) one day saw her pale face, he asked: "What has happened to you, Fatima?" She answered: "We did not have anything in the house for three days." The Imam (as) said: "Why didn’t you tell me?" She replied: "My father, the Prophet of God (pbuh) told me on the wedding night: Fatima, eat when Ali brings food otherwise do not ask for it.”But this does not mean that, God forbid, the Imam was negligent of the house, or that a Muslim should be oblivious of the situation of the wife and children.
Six: Be the first to reconcile when there is a quarrel between you and your husband for God has said: "And if a woman fears ill usage or desertion on the part of her husband, there is no blame on them if they effect a reconciliation between them and reconciliation is better."
Reveal your affection to your husband and teach him a lesson with your reconciliation that he would never forget.
Seven: Avoid anger and jeer. Do not argue much and do not reveal the other’s faults. Do not ask for a life as if the other is for it would weaken the marriage bond. Forget and forgive things that might upset you. Your life is now different from when you were single since you are sharing your life with somebody else.
God willing these points may remind our dear sisters of some of their great responsibilities and help them to become a faithful wife.
other links:
How to make your wife happy
Mother:The Best & Closest Friend
